I was there at six o’clock

I was there at six o’clock
But where the hell were you?
I had on my brand new frock
Of white and royal blue.
I could get no answer
From your phone, you dirty chancer.
Now you have the cheek to knock
As chancers often do

Joan told me she saw you
Walking out with Ce-li-a.
I’d do anything for you
But you chose to go with her.
The world knows she’s a trollop
And I’ll soon give her a wallop
But clearly I must bore you
If she’s who you prefer.

I was there at seven o’clock,
Re-touching up my face
But Celia from Castleknock
Was walking in my place.
Like a dog I panted
And you sure took me for granted
But it was a mighty shock
When you touched second base.

Get away from my front door
Or I will surely scream.
Dad was right about you, for
He warned me you would scheme.
And Dad is in the kitchen
And I see the curtain twitchin’,
So stay around a little more
And you will see some steam.

I was there at eight o’clock
You dirty, rotten cheat,
Watching all the people flock
To Clancy’s up the street.
But now my heart is jumping
And you’re going to get a thumping,
Better run around the block
Or end up ‘neath a sheet.