If Only…..

If only I’d got to the shop one hour later,
If only I’d used the correct escalator,
If only I’d spotted that huge alligator,
If only, if only, if only.

If only old Adolf had been a Hispanic,
Or sailed to America on the Titanic,
Or worked all his life as a motor mechanic,
If only, if only, if only.

If only our marking had been watertight,
If only our Packie had punched it that night,
If only Schillachi had been on the right,
If only, if only, if only.

If only my Dad had worked harder in life,
And taken a millionairess for a wife,
I wouldn’t have all of this trouble and strife,
If only, if only, if only.

If only – two words so pathetically small
Can make a sane man bang his head off a wall,
But, if you look closely, they mean bugger all,
If only, if only, if only.